


His Own Eyes

by krysnel_nicavis



Series: You Can Imagine His Surprise [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Accidental Pregnancy, Break Up, Childbirth, Developing Relationship, Family, Family Bonding, M/M, Mpreg, Parenthood, Past Relationship(s), Post-Break Up, Pregnant Castiel, Romance, Temporary Castiel/Theo, Wordcount: 10.000-30.000, bottom!Castiel, top!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 11:02:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10436229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krysnel_nicavis/pseuds/krysnel_nicavis
Summary: Then it happened one day, we came round the same way / You can imagine his surprise when he saw his own eyes / I said please, please understand / I’m in love with another man / And what he couldn’t give me / was the one little thing that you canCastiel is in love. When his heart gets unexpectedly broken, he winds up on the side of a road in the middle of a downpour. Little does he know, the handsome stranger who comes to his rescue will ultimately save him in more ways than just ensuring he doesn’t freeze in the rain… and ends up coincidentally giving Cas what he wants, what he needs, most.[Sequel/Companion piece to "All I Wanna Do" - Can be read alone]





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As I have no intention of explaining how mpreg works within the body of the actual story, I will explain it here in the notes.
> 
> Please note that this will read quite a bit like an information pamphlet/text book entry.
> 
>  **For the purposes of this storyline:**  
>  \- Males capable of becoming pregnant are known as carriers. Carriers are typically addressed using a mix of gender pronouns, usually depending on the situation. More often than not, they are addressed with male pronouns, pregnancy and parenthood often being the chief exception where female pronouns might then be used. (Example: Carrier parents are usually referred to as 'mothers'.)
> 
>  **Anatomy:**  
>  (1) Carriers posess a fully formed, semi-fuctional external male reproductive system (there are two testicles, but due, in part, to the higher level of estrogen attainable by carriers than men, they have a generally low sperm count with a 12% chance of impregnating a woman or another carrier) and a semi-formed, fully functional internal female reproductive system (there is only one ovary present in carriers, and due, in part, to the higher level of testosterone present in carriers than women, there is a 63% chance of miscarriage).  
> (2) Carriers also have a secondary opening attatched to the base of their colon. It is located directly beside their prostate gland and directly across from, and accessible through, their anus and secretes a substance that kills off harmful bacteria that may enter via the colon. This opening is largely inaccessible, especially when the carrier's body is in need of vacating waste (defacation). When closed, it seals shut in a similar type manner to the way the epiglottis in the throat functions when swallowing. **see section on pregnancy for more information**  
> (3) Carriers are capapble of breastfeeding, however produce milk in a smaller volume than women.
> 
>  **Fertility:**  
>  (1) Ovulation - occurs once every 2 months. As with a woman, it can last for approximately 3 days.  
> (2) Menstruation - the same as for women.  
> (3) Pregnancy - carriers are capable of getting pregnant naturally through anal intercourse when their secondary opening unseals and becomes very easily accessible via the anus during during ovulation. (Please note that it can occasionally unseal during times of arousal in the 4-5 days leading up to ovulation.) Pregnancy can also be attainable through in-vitro fertilization (IVF) where specialized hormone supplaments can encourage ovulation outside a carrier's usual cycle. The secondary opening remains sealed for the duration of the pregnancy. Length of carrier pregnacies are similar to pregnancies in women.  
> (4) Childbirth - similar to childbirth in women with one notable difference: in addition to dialation of the cervix, carriers have a thrid opening, locate along the perenium (between the scrotum and anus), that also dialates and forms the birth canal.
> 
> I think that about covers it.
> 
> * * * * * * *

Castiel had just completed his bachelor’s degree for accounting when he first met Theo.  The twenty-seven-year-old electrician was tall and handsome.  Taller than Cas by about five inches, with warm brown eyes, shoulder length black hair, and a thick scruffy beard.  At twenty-three, Castiel was besotted.  They’d had a whirlwind summer romance before he had returned to university for his master’s degree – which he managed in a single year – and the summer romance became a happy memory.  It was around ten years later that the tax accountant and his once summer lover crossed paths again, at a Christmas party thrown by a colleague of Castiel’s.  Theo had accompanied his sister as her plus one and that night found the two reuniting under the mistletoe.  Three years later, the two were still blissfully in love.  In fact, it was more apparent with each passing day that the relationship was shifting into something even more serious…

* * *

Castiel groaned and burrowed further under the blankets.  There was a chuckle somewhere near his left ear.  “Come on, Honeybee,” a light voice tried to tempt him out from his hiding place. “It’s time to get up. The sun’s already up.”

“Tell it to fuck off,” Castiel grumbled with a muffled, gravelly voice.

The voice chuckled again. “No can do, Sweetie.” The person belonging to the voice nudged Castiel through the blankets. “Come on my little hedgehog, the coffee pot’s already started brewing.”

Castiel let out a whining groan and pushed himself into a sitting positing.  He aimed a tired glare at his boyfriend and pouted.  “I am _not_ a hedgehog.”

Theo snorted and grinned. “You’re all prickly in the morning before you’ve had your first cup of coffee, but you lack the barbs to be a porcupine.”

Castiel made a face and Theo laughed heartily.  He yawned and curled into his boyfriend’s side, pressing a few noisy kisses to the older man’s bare shoulder.  He laid his head against said shoulder and sighed. “Is it Saturday yet?”

“Sorry, Honeybee,” Theo replied and stood up, stretching his arms above his head before heading out to the kitchen.  Castiel admired the way the muscles in his back pulled taut and watched him go, only mildly put out at having to be awake at such an ungodly hour.  Sometimes he wondered what it would be like to have a different life.  One that offered something a little more interesting than taxes, and the consultant position he had for a couple of local churches.  Something like a secret agent, or maybe pest control.  The scent of freshly brewed coffee wafted in from the kitchen of the spacious one bedroom apartment the two had shared for the majority of the past year, bringing him out of his musings.  He snorted at himself and dragged his still sleepy body out of bed, following the heavenly aroma to where his loving, thoughtful, and supportive boyfriend held out a freshly prepared mug of coffee.  He breathed in the scent and took a tentative sip.  He sighed happily: just how he liked it.

He sat at the table in the kitchen, nursing his morning coffee as Theo read through his news subscriptions on his iPad.  When it kicked in, he started cooking breakfast for the two of them like he did every morning.  They sat at the table together as they ate.  He loved this.  The domesticity of it.  He could see himself, in scenes just like this, with this wonderful man by his side for the rest of his life.

* * *

Castiel curled into Theo’s side when he dropped down on the couch beside him.  He’d had a long day.  His company was in the middle of handling an audit so he was needing to work later than usual.  He exhaled a contented sigh as he nestled closer to his boyfriend’s warmth.  This was Castiel’s favourite time of day.  When he could rid himself of his suit and tie and get into his old Uni sweat pants and t-shirt and snuggle up to his boyfriend on the couch.  They would sit together and watch the evening news, or catch an episode (or two) of _How It’s Made_ on Discovery, or binge watch one of Theo’s procedural cop shows.  Sometimes they even watched one of Castiel’s animal documentaries.  There was only one thing Cas could conceivably see making this better.

“Theo?”

“Hmm?” Theo distractedly acknowledged him.

“Do you ever think about what it would be like if we had a baby?”  His question was met with silence. “Theo?”

“A- _what?_ ” Theo pulled away and turned to look at him.  Castiel sat up straight and turned towards Theo as well.

“Do you ever think about it?” Castiel asked. “What it would be like?” Theo looked at him like he’d suddenly sprouted a second head. “Can’t you just imagine a mini version of us running around?” Cas smiled at the thought. “A little girl with your hair and my eyes? Or a little boy with your laugh and my smile? Calling you ‘daddy’ and building pillow forts in the living room?”

Theo suddenly stood, a distressed expression on his face. “Cas, _stop_ ,” he snapped. “Just stop.”

“Theo…” Castiel sounded hurt.  Theo’s reaction confused him.  His boyfriend was so good with the children of their friends and family that Castiel couldn’t understand why the thought of their own would upset him.  He stood and stepped towards him.  Theo pulled away, recoiling like the thought of touching Castiel repulsed him.  That hurt more than Theo snapping at him. “Theo?”

“Just drop it, Cas,” he said as he walked out of the living room and into the kitchen.  Castiel stood rooted to the floor for a few breaths before shaking himself and following.

“I… I don’t understand.” Theo sighed as he studied the contents of the fridge. “You’re so good with your nieces and nephews. Even with our friends’ kids. You’d be a wonderful father–”

Theo slammed the fridge shut, causing Castiel to jump. “I said _drop it!_ ”

“But–”

“Castiel,” Theo interrupted, sounding desperate. _“Please.”_

“Why?” Castiel asked in a gasp. “Why does the thought of _our_ child upset you?”  Theo didn’t answer.  He let out a frustrated sigh and brushed past Castiel to exit the kitchen. “Please,” Castiel begged. “Tell me why.” He followed his boyfriend out of the room again. “Tell me–”

“Because it’s _impossible_ , Castiel!” Theo yelled as he spun around to face Cas.  The television playing in the background was the only sound in the room.

“What do you mean?” Castiel gasped, shocked. “I don’t–”

“I had a vasectomy when I was twenty-five,” Theo admitted.

 _“Wh-what?”_ Castiel took a step back, shocked to his core.  He suddenly felt his whole world collapsing around him. “Wh…” He was having a hard time breathing and almost fell onto the couch as he sat down.  He felt betrayed. “When were you going to tell me?” Theo looked down.  Castiel narrowed his eyes. “Were you _ever_ going to tell me?”

“I didn’t think it would ever be an issue,” Theo finally offered. “I just figured, after all this time… It hadn’t come up, so…”

Castiel’s vision blurred as his eyes filled with tears.  Theo dropped to his knees in front of him, taking Castiel’s hands in his. “Honeybee…” At the endearment, Castiel snatched his hands back, glaring at his boyfriend. “Cas?” Theo reached for him again.

“Don’t touch me,” Cas choked out and stood, pushing past Theo. “I can’t believe you.” He felt the room.

“Cas,” Theo called out after him. “Cas, I’m sorry. Cas!”

Castiel locked himself in the bedroom.  He curled up on his side in the middle of the bed, so angry that he cried himself to sleep.

The truth was, Castiel had _always_ known he’d wanted children.  Back when he and Theo had shared their summer romance all those years ago, it simply wasn’t the right time for Castiel to be thinking of children.  He was still in university and he knew what direction he wanted his life to go in.  The same was true of his two failed relationships in the ensuing years between that summer and when they’d reunited.  When they’d met at that party three years ago, Castiel had wanted to focus on building a relationship.  One that would have the type of atmosphere that he would want to raise a child in.  It was why he always insisted on using condoms.  He hadn’t been ready to actively try to have the children he knew he wanted to lavish with love and attention.  And now, to find out it not only had never been a possibility with the man he loved, the man he’d planned on spending the rest of his life with, but to realize that said man couldn’t even be honest enough to tell him…

He packed a bag and moved into a hotel the next day.


	2. Chapter 2

**Four months later:**

Castiel had needed some time to himself.  After breaking up with Theo, he moved into a tiny apartment in a different area of Pontiac from the much larger one the two had shared.  For over three months he felt like he was going through the motions.  Just drifting from day to day, going to work, running errands, going home.  He eventually decided he needed a break.  Well after summer ended, when hints of the upcoming winter were beginning to crisp the autumn air, he decided he needed a break.  Some time to just get away from everything.  At the urging of his older brother, he put in for some much earned time off, got into his old but dependable truck, and just drove.  He travelled aimlessly from town to town like he was trying to find something he couldn’t identify.  Maybe it was himself.

Each place began to blend into the next.  He had taken to walking around the towns he stopped in, no destination in mind.  It was only a matter of time before he’d wandered a little too far and gotten himself lost.  And then it started raining.

Perfect, he’d thought to himself wryly.

He was standing still, just letting the freezing rain pelt down on him, when the sleek, dark coloured car pulled up next to him, its driver beckoning him in.  He almost declined, but a tiny nudge in the back of his mind had him accepting and sliding into the passenger seat of classic car.  And they drove as long as they could through the downpour.  The driver turned the heat up, which he’d appreciated.

It was quickly becoming impossible to see anything through the rain pelting the windshield.  Castiel wasn’t even remotely surprised when the man turned the car into a motel parking lot.  “Sorry man,” he’d said as he parked the car in one of the few remaining spaces. “I think we’re stranded.”

Castiel sighed internally.  That pretty much summed up his life.  “I-it’s alright,” he replied, stuttering from the cold he still felt despite the warmth of the car.  He turned to look at the stranger who had essentially rescued him from drowning in rainwater.  In the light offered by the motel and surrounding streetlights, he felt his face beginning to flush and his heartbeat speed up as he was able to better see the definitions of the man’s facial structure.  Even in the low light it was easy to see just how handsome he was.  Like someone that had up and walked off the page of a magazine.  When their eyes met he felt like he was falling into a pool.  A warm pool with a gentle, soothing current.  There was suddenly a tiny alarm in the back of his head uttering the phrase ‘Warning! Warning!’ incessantly, as it always did when he was on the verge of making a questionable decision. “I, um… I th-think I can walk the rest of the way to my hotel,” he offered with only partial conviction, this time his stutter wasn’t from the cold.  It was probably for the best that they part ways now.

The handsome stranger’s skeptical question stalled that train of thought. “Do you even remember what part of town it’s in?”  Castiel thought about it.  He tried to be honest with himself most of the time, and if he were completely honest now he’d admit that he wasn’t even sure what part of town he was in right _now_.  He could always call a taxi… rain pelted the car, proving that to be a foolhardy assumption. “C’mon, man, it’s no problem. We can share a room for the night.”  The warning alarm blared a little louder this time.  Then the man aimed a smile in his direction and, without consciously meaning to, agreed and returned a smile of his own. “Great! Wait here and I’ll go get checked in.”

Castiel watched as he made his way quickly from the car to the lobby, trying in vain to stay dry in the incessant downpour.  As he waited, listening to heavy droplets striking the top of the car and watching as it streamed down the windows, he questioned himself.  What was he doing?  He shouldn’t be _staying_ here.  He barely knew the man.  For all he knew they guy could be a serial killer…  A devastatingly attractive serial killer…  One who drove across the country rescuing random strangers caught in the rain and bringing them to out of the way motels to have his wicked way with…  He couldn’t be sure, but the man seemed to be solidly built under the canvas jacket…  Castiel shook himself.  Sure, it had been four whole months since he and his ex broke up, and he had been getting rather _frustrated_ recently as he hadn’t been with anyone since, but that was no excuse to entertain such notions about a man he’d only just met.  Was it?  Even if he was a prime example of manhood.  He probably wasn’t interested anyway.  The better question was: did he want the man to be?  The yearning feeling thrumming in his body was beginning to answer.

His thoughts were disturbed by the sound of the trunk slamming shut.  He took a deep, calming breath and exited the car, following the man as quickly as possible to a room on the main floor.  A room with only one bed.

The man cleared his throat. “I uh, they only had single beds left.”  Castiel looked at the man’s face, which was even more clearly visible in the light of the room.  He really was a devastatingly handsome man.  He probably had his pick of any crowd.  The man tossed the bag in his hands onto the small table. “I… well, I can get a separate room if it would make you more comfortable.”

Castiel thought about it, and about his earlier question for himself.  Did he want separate rooms, or did he want to test the man’s interest?  He sighed internally for what felt like the millionth time lately.  He wanted to feel wanted again.  Even if it was just for a night.  He moved closer to the man’s side.  “It’s fine,” he replied softly.

The man started, looking up quickly. “O-oh… good…”  Castiel took the small grin the man gave him and the blush as a positive sign.  As he looked into the man’s apple green eyes, he thought he saw more than a hint of interest. “Good.”

“Yes,” Castiel said in a hushed tone, invading the man’s personal space.  Close enough to feel warm puffs of breath on his lips.  His being vibrated as he swam in that warm gaze.  He wanted.  _Oh_ how he wanted. “Yes.”

His heart hammered in his chest as he felt warm, soft lips tentatively press against his.  The man pulled back slightly, looking at him as though gauging his reaction.  He wanted.

Clothing was practically torn from their bodies, a rush of noisy, heated kisses exchanged.  Gasping moans eliciting from their throats as want gave way to a near desperation.  They laughed as his sodden tie almost got stuck and Castiel ended up yanking it over his head when the opening was large enough and tossing it across the room.  The man shivered as he ran his cold hands along his warm, muscular frame, learning the contours of his new lover’s body.  The man pulled away long enough to rifle through his bag, producing a bottle of lube and a condom, the latter of which he held up, a question in his eyes.  Castiel bit his lip, finding the man adorable despite himself.  “I’m clean,” he answered the unasked question, feeling adventurous.  There was no danger of coming away from this with more than expected for at least another week.

“So am I,” he grinned and tossed it in the direction of his bag.  It was Castiel’s turn to shiver as the man pulled his chilled body close and kissed him deeply.  Castiel sighed and leaned into him.  Their growing erections slid against one another and he gasped audibly into the man’s mouth.

Before he knew it he was laying on his back on the bed, arms tossed above his head, thighs spread wide as the man teased him opened him up with steady, nimble fingers while the silky heat of the man’s throat worked him into full hardness.  Castiel wasn’t normally one to be overly vocal in bed, but the skilful ministrations of the man between his legs as he unerringly found his prostate with every thrust of his fingers was bringing forth such wanton sounds from his throat that he’d easily find lucrative employment in the porn industry. 

“ _Oh,_ ” he groaned loudly.  Castiel quivered around the man’s dexterous fingers, hands in fists against his mouth and throat, knees drawing up higher, and blushing like a virgin.  He wanted more, _needed_ more. “Please,” he begged.  _Begged._   He fancied himself an appreciative lover, but he never recalled ever being reduced to begging in bed before. “ _P-please_ …” He rather liked the feeling.

“Tell me,” the man breathed.  He managed to open his eyes a look down at the man, taking in the heated, lustful gaze. “Tell me what you need.”

“Ah-I,” he gasped as the fingers inside him brushed against the bundle of nerves again. “I n-need-” His breath quickened as he pushed back against the man’s probing. “I need you,” he finally managed. “I need you in me.” _Now._   He needed him, desperately.  Like air. _“Please.”_

“Anything you want, Sweetheart.” He almost wept at the promise in the man’s tone.  As the man lined up his lube slicked cock to Castiel’s loosened entrance, he lifted his legs to rest on the man’s shoulders, pushing himself up so he was half sitting.  He grunted as the head of the man’s thick shaft breached his ring, gasped as he slowly and steadily encased himself inside Castiel’s body.

When the man bottomed out, Castiel felt a sense of completion.  He groaned at the delicious fullness, hearing a similar groan from the man in return.  Their bodies fitted perfectly into place against one another.  Molded together as if they were designed for nothing else but to come together in blissful union.  To be one for all of eternity.  And they were only getting started.

Each thrust was expertly aimed to nail his prostate, and with each thrust Castiel felt his very being torn blissfully apart and remade anew, only have the same process start again, and again, and again, and again.  His throaty moans could rival that of the best whore and couldn’t bring himself to care if the whole motel could hear it.  His lover’s pace quickened and he let himself fall back, unable to hold himself up any longer in the onslaught.

He was momentarily confused when the man pulled out, only to feel himself being pulled onto the man’s body, back pressed to the man’s chest, and groaning wantonly as he thrust back in.  Castiel braced himself on the wall above the bed as the man held him by the knees as he thrust up into him.

He suddenly felt the need to be able to see his lover.  So he pushed off of him and turned around, straddling the man and, with his hands braced on the man’s chest, rode the thick, hard cock until stars erupted in his eyes.  A last, strangled, guttural moan tore from his throat and his vision blanked and he momentarily lost consciousness.

He blinked staring at the ceiling as his entire body trembled.  He inhaled a long, slow breath, moving sluggishly.  Hands pulled him to the side and tucked him in close, he was lost in a last, soul claiming kiss to those plump, perfect lips before finally drifting out of the realm of reality and contently into the land of dreams.

* * *

Castiel awoke to the first rays of daylight.  He tried to move and groaned at the protesting of his incredibly sore muscles.  He groaned and burrowed into the warm heat of the body next to him, intent on going back to sleep.  His eyes snapped open.  Body?  Who?  He gulped and slowly turned his head to see who he was curled around and his brain stalled.  The man was absolutely breathtaking to look at.  The previous night came back to him in a rush and he felt himself blushing.  He wouldn’t be surprised if he were red from head to toe.

He carefully extracted him from the strong arms that encircled him and stood, blushing harder as he recalled those arms holding him up against the wall during round two of, arguably, the best sex he’d ever had in his life.  He smiled as he looked back down at the handsome stranger lying on the rumpled bed.  Each round seemed to bring out a different side of this kind man who had pulled over in the rain for a complete stranger.  It was probably reckless, spending such a night with someone he didn’t know, but Castiel couldn’t bring himself to regret any part of it.  It was nice to fell wanted.  Even treasured.

Castiel’s smile turned sad.  All things considered, it would be better for both of them if he weren’t here when the man awoke.  So he rummaged around and pulled on as much of his uncomfortable, but mostly dry, clothing as he could quickly find and went to leave.  He paused with his hand on the doorknob and looked back at the sleeping man.  He sighed and found the complementary stationary in the room, and scrawled out a note:

 _Forgive me for simply leaving with nothing more than  
a note on the table, but I thought it was for the best._

_Were it another time, another place, maybe even_  
_another lifetime, things might have gone differently._  
_We could’ve woken up wrapped in each other’s arms_  
_and made love all over again._

 _But we’re strangers, and last night was something I’ve_  
_never done before in my entire life.  I’d never even_  
_considered it.  Please know that, with all of my soul,_  
_I will never regret our night together.  It was perfect. _  
_It was everything I ever dreamed it could be.  But this_  
_can never be more than a memory.  Please, don’t try_  
_to find me.  Just live in my memory. I’ll cherish this_  
_night, and you, always._

He placed the note next to the man’s bag, which still sat on the table, and left.  Thankfully, he was carrying his wallet.  The young woman at the front desk smiled as she phoned a taxi for him and he stood outside to wait.  The rain had stopped and the road glistened in the rising sun.  He wasn’t sure, but as the sun rose, there seemed to be more colour in the world this morning.

Maybe things were finally changing for the better.


	3. Chapter 3

For the sixth time in a row Castiel was scrambling out of bed just as the sun was coming up.  That wasn’t counting the seven times he’d felt nauseous just from turning too quickly over the past three days alone.  He had also noticed his sense of smell was off – the normally light scent of the deodorant some of his coworkers favoured was becoming stifling – and yesterday he noticed that his nipples and the area surrounding them was beginning to tingle and become uncomfortable when touched.

It had been two weeks since his tryst with the handsome stranger with the magnetic green eyes … and he was over a week late.  As he rested his forehead on the cool edge of the porcelain tub next to the toilet, his eyes watered.  The thirty-six-year-old tax accountant from Pontiac, Illinois curled up against the tub, hands pressed flat to his abdomen.  His stomach rolled and settled and his eyes overflowed.

He was pregnant.

He remembered all the prayers he’s sent, invoking various angels, and saints, and even God himself over the years, asking, somehow, to gift him with a child.  Out of all of them, it seemed that the archangel Gabriel had answered his prayers.  And, though he was grateful – he already loved the tiny being he just knew was growing inside him – he wished the circumstances had been different.  When he’s envisioned his life with a child, he’d always imagined his boyfriend by his side.  Theo was always so caring.  Castiel was sure that, had they been able to have children together, his boyfriend would have been attentive during the pregnancy.  Supportive.  But that wasn’t to be.

Castiel sniffed, gently stroking his abdomen.  He thought, instead, about his baby’s father.  He wondered how his child would look – optimistic despite the one-in-three chance the foetus would survive until birth.  Would it look like Castiel?  Dark hair and stormy blue eyes.  Or would it have much lighter hair and apple green eyes like the beautiful man who had saved him from getting lost in the storm?  Would it have his pouty lips?  His freckles?  Or would it be a perfect blend of the both of them?  For a few brief moments, Castiel allowed himself to envision a future that included the kind stranger.  Supportive and caring.  Stroking Castiel’s rounded belly as reverently as he had in his post-coital affection; pressing his lips where their child moved and grew as easily as he had trailed them down Castiel’s neck and chest; gazing as tenderly at their newborn child as he had at Castiel during their third round of lovemaking.  He shook himself of the fantasy when he began picturing the two of them creating a second child.  There was no good to come from dwelling on dreams.

He sighed, looking down at his flat stomach, and hugged himself.  “I’m afraid it’s just you and me, Little Bee.”  He snorted at himself.  He was already getting sappy.  His stomach had settled so he pulled himself up off the floor and flushed the contents of the toilet away and rinsing out his mouth before going to find something to eat that he’d be able to keep down.

* * *

Castiel sat in the waiting room of his doctor’s office the three weeks later.  Despite his certainty up to this point, he was simultaneously feeling an equal amount of trepidation and denial.  Dr. Banks specialized in carrier health and his partner, Dr. Mackenzie, specialized in carrier pregnancies.  He was reasonably comfortable that he and the three week old embryo were in capable hands.  Owing to how soon it was, Cas had refrained from telling anyone of his suspected condition.  He may be confident, but the chances of a positive outcome were still thirty-seven percent.  He worried.  Telling someone would only increase his worry.  His brother would say he was being stupid.  That sharing would actually lessen his worries, not increase them.  But Castiel wanted this too much.  _Needed_ this too much.

He looked around the waiting room at the other patients.  Three of them were obviously in different stages of their pregnancies.  They all looked happy.  Two looked tired, but still happy.  All three were accompanied by their significant others – one of which was a woman.  Castiel was intrigued by this but unsurprised.  When a carrier was in a committed relationship with a woman, it wasn’t uncommon for the two to alternate pregnancies (IVF always being needed for the carrier pregnancies).  Many couples chose this route, despite the inherent risks involved.  In some rare cases, the woman was, for various reasons, unable to carry a pregnancy to term, so the couple turned to modern medicine and opted for the carrier to have the embryo implanted.  This was the case for his older brother, Jimmy, and sister-in-law, Amelia.

The couple had been trying for children for years, but, sadly, none of Amelia’s four pregnancies reached the third trimester.  The last one had come close.  It was determined that Amelia had a condition that gave her a significantly lower chance of carrying to term than carriers.  Not wanting to see his wife go through the physical loss a fifth time, Jimmy, who is also a carrier, opted to try.  They were cautiously optimistic when the implantation was successful, and through the entire pregnancy.  There was a major scare shortly into the third trimester and Castiel feared he’d have to watch the two suffer another tragic loss.  But Jimmy took to bedrest without complaint when his doctor ordered him to do so.  The result was a healthy baby girl, born three weeks early, whom they named Claire.

Claire was now nineteen and in university.  She was taking a peculiar mix of religious studies and supernatural lore.  While her parents were unsure of how much to approve of the joint major, considering both of their religious upbringings, Castiel was intrigued and enjoyed the discussions he got into with his niece – she’d even managed to get him hooked on a certain book series by a guy named Carver Edlund, and gotten a particular tattoo that Cas promised not to tell her parents about.  He thought back to that night in the rain and suddenly realized that he’d recognized the tattoo on his one-night-lover’s chest.  He hid a tiny smirk behind his hand as he studied the patter in the carpet.  Claire’s university offered very informative classes on Enochian and he’d liked the look of the language.  He’d agreed that, if she found the right protective runes that they both liked, he’d get a tattoo of his own.

He wondered if their apparent shared interest meant that they’d get along, his mystery lover and his niece.  If the man’s personality was anything like his smartass and sarcastic niece then their interactions could be interesting to witness.  She was quite a bit like Jimmy in that respect.  Castiel was sometimes described as being salty by comparison.  Clutching his shirt above his abdomen in one hand, he wondered which personality the baby would have…

“Castiel Novak.” The voice of the nurse cut through his thoughts.  A glance around him showed that the people around him had changed – the ones he’d been aware of gone and a few new individuals sitting in their place.  He stood, smoothing down the front of his shirt and following the nurse into an examination room where his basic vitals were taken before he was left to await Dr. Banks.

He returned the following week.  This time for an appointment with Dr. Mackenzie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Footnote:**  
>  (1) While Gabriel is classified as not only and Archangel but also a Cherubim, cherubim have, according to my research, been “erroneously associated with … the Greco-Roman god Cupid/Eros”. However, it’s SPN Gabriel we’re talking about. He would totally take getting two people together into his wheelhouse (or maybe just getting these two people together).


	4. Chapter 4

While his chest had been tender, after the four weeks they were downright sore.  He’d broken down and told Jimmy as soon as he had his first sonogram in hand.  His brother had insisted on accompanying him to all his future appointments the moment he’d fully comprehended what Castiel was telling him.  He’d been wary about explaining to the elder Novak just how he’d wound up unexpectedly pregnant, but Jimmy and Amelia had proved nothing but completely supportive.  In hindsight he figured he should have expected the couple to be as accepting as they were about such a situation.  Claire was both excited at the prospect of a cousin and impressed at her uncle’s surprising spontaneity.

He and Jimmy were commiserating over early symptoms.  (“My nipples are huge!” / “Wait until you start breastfeeding.” / _“It’s embarrassing!”_ / “Oh, you sweet, summer child…” / “Shut up, assbutt… oh my God, _I’m so fucking horny!”_ / “Ew.” / Castiel got away with shoving his brother off the couch a lot.)  Even Amelia joint in at times – while memories of her failed pregnancies were still painful over twenty years after the fact, she was able to talk more openly about her own experiences with pregnancy.  She made sure he had a stash of snack foods that his stomach was able to keep down on hand at all times.

He had another ultrasound scheduled around his twelfth week. 

“Amelia, it’s okay, really,” Castiel said for maybe the fourth time in fifteen minutes. “I understand. You have to work, it’s not a problem… Yes, I know. I know you’d be here if you could. Yes… yes… of course… yes… Okay, Amelia, we’re here… yes… yes… yes…” he could see Jimmy silently laughing at him from the corner of his eye and ignored him. “Yes, ye- I promise. I will. Yes, I will. Yes, he will too. I’ll tell him. I love you too. Okay. Okay, bye.” He hung up his cell phone and aimed a glare at his brother.  In response, Jimmy laughed out loud. “You know, I could just call her back and tell her you’re laughing at her…” Jimmy’s laughter stopped immediately.

“That’s just cold, Cas,” he glared back at him.  Castiel looked smug and exited his brother’s green Mazda.  Amelia was _very_ apologetic that she couldn’t get the time off work for the day and insisted that he tell her everything when she got home.

“You’re probably going to hear the heartbeat today,” Jimmy said as they took a seat in the waiting room.  He could tell his younger brother was nervous, but Jimmy was confident that things were going to be alright. “That’s exciting.”

Castiel’s knee bounced nervously. “Jimmy?” he said in a small voice.

“Hey, what’s the matter, Cas?” Jimmy asked, placing a comforting hand on Castiel’s back.

“What…” Cas swallowed thickly, eyes on the floor, and leaned into his brother.  There was only a four year age gap between them, but even as small children Castiel had been able to turn to his big brother for anything, be it a scraped knee or the creepy thing that lived under his nightstand. “What if they find something wrong? What if-”

“Cas? Cassie, look at me,” Jimmy nudged him until he sat up and lifted his gaze. “It’s going to be alright, Cas. I know it is.”

“How?”

Jimmy shrugged one shoulder. “Because I just do. I have complete faith. It’ll work out, you’ll see.” Castiel bit his bottom lip and nodded, leaning back into his brother’s side.

The ultrasound technician was happy with the results she saw on the monitor, pointing out things of interest to both of them.  When the she flipped a switch on the machine and the room was filled with the whooshing sound of his child’s heartbeat, Castiel found himself clutching his brother’s hand, neither caring about the tears streaming down their nearly identical faces.

* * *

“I’ve decided I don’t want to know what it is,” Castiel announced.  He had just reached the third trimester marker and was going for another ultrasound.  The Dr Mackenzie had told them that they’d be able to determine the baby’s base gender this time – if it was male, determining whether or not it would also be a carrier was only possible after birth.

“Are you sure, Uncle Cas?” Claire asked as she speared some more bacon onto her plate.  They were all sitting down for breakfast at Amelia and Jimmy’s house.  Claire was finished with school for the year, having decided to forego summer classes in order to be close by during the last stage of Castiel’s pregnancy.

“As long as it’s healthy, I don’t care what it is,” Castiel insisted.

Claire shrugged. “As long as I get to dress it like a Hallowe’en decoration.” She’d vowed that, if they didn’t find out the gender before it was born, she was going to dress it in various combinations of orange, purple, green, and black after it was born.  Secretly, Castiel found this not only amusing but also fitting.  The child had been conceived in the week prior to Hallowe’en, after all.

* * *

“No, I mean it. I don’t want anyone to buy anything just yet,” Castiel was adamant. “It makes me nervous.” He sat in the passenger seat of his brother’s car, Amelia and Claire in the back while Jimmy drove.  He rubbed an idle hand on his rounded stomach, taking comfort in the active movements of the foetus within.  They’d just come from Castiel’s latest ultrasound.  The doctor was pleased with the baby’s progress, which put Castiel at ease.

“Okay, I get it. No shopping,” Claire relented. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t at least _look_ at things you’ll need. There’s no harm in simply being aware of what things cost. At the very least, we can compare prices on different things.”  There were certain things that Castiel would need to buy new – like a car seat and stroller.  But Claire’s old crib was sturdy and had been hand crafted by Jimmy and Castiel’s father when Jimmy and Amelia had first been trying to have a child.  The old man had happily lived long enough to gift it to his granddaughter when she was born.  She used it until she became a little too efficient at climbing out of it, at which time her parents graduated her to a small bed.

“That’s fair,” Jimmy offered.  Castiel agreed and so they stopped at a mall.  Claire and Amelia gushed over tiny clothing as Jimmy and Castiel debated the pros and cons of different models of car seats and strollers.  Castiel wandered down a different aisle when Jimmy stopped to look closer at infant seats – the kind that are supposed to comfort your baby when you’re not holding them.

“Cas?”

Castiel turned towards the end of the aisle from where he was looking at a stuffed squirrel to find… “Theo?”  Castiel felt a pang in his chest at the sight of his ex-boyfriend.  He hadn’t realized until that moment just how much he missed the man.

“Cas, what are you doing here?” Theo’s eyes drifted down and he stared in shock. “You…” he blinked, not seeming to be able to believe what he was seeing. “You’re _pregnant?”_

Castiel placed his hands on his stomach, feeling a little defensive at the way his ex said ‘pregnant’.  He looked down to where his child was turning beneath his hands. “Y-yes.” He lifted his gaze back to the man still standing a few feet from him. “I am.”

“So, whose is it?”

Castiel blinked at the blunt question. “I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

Theo sighed and looked down, running a hand through his hair. “You’re right. That was insensitive of me.” He looked back up and studied Castiel’s face. “So, when are you…?” He gestured to Castiel’s midsection.

“The baby’s due around mid-July.”

“Ah. That’s… that’s good.” Theo nodded. “That’s really, really good. I’m glad. For you.”

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, well… yeah.” Theo sent him a saddened look and turned to walk away.

Castiel bit his bottom lip for a moment. “Theo, wait.” He stopped and looked back as Cas moved closer to him. “I… I’m sorry,” Cas said. “For what happened, between us.”

“Yeah, I’m sorry too,” Theo offered.

“I…” Castiel had no idea what he wanted to say.  Theo was a good man.  He’d made a poor judgement call in not telling Castiel about the vasectomy, that much was true.  But it was something that had happened before the two of them had ever even met.  Castiel found, as he looked at the man for the first time in almost a year, that he couldn’t be angry with him over it any more.

“I’ve missed you, Cas.”

Castiel swallowed the lump that was suddenly in his throat. “I’ve missed you too.”

“So, is your new man around here somewhere?” Theo asked, looking behind Cas.

“My new- what?”

Theo shrugged. “Just curious about who managed to scoop you up after…”

“I, I’m not,” Castiel looked away, face hot. “There isn’t any.”

“Huh?”

Castiel looked back up. “There’s no ‘new man’,” he admitted.

“You go to a sperm bank, or something?” Theo frowned.

“No,” Castiel frowned as well. “It was just…”

“A mistake?”

Castiel’s lips thinned.  The baby gave a particularly hard kick, making him gasp.  He rubbed a soothing hand over the spot.

“Hey Cas, I was looking at- oh.” Jimmy came around the corner and paused a moment when he saw Theo. “Hello.” He continued to his brother’s side. “Theo.”

Theo nodded. “Hello, Jimmy.” He turned back to Castiel. “It was good to see you again, Cas.”

“You too,” Cas nodded.

“I hope we meet up again soon.” He left the brothers in the stuffed animal aisle.

“You okay?” Jimmy asked, placing a supportive arm around Castiel.

“Y-yeah, I’m okay,” Cas replied, wiping at his face. “I was just surprised to see him. We haven’t spoken since… you know. It was good to see him again.” Jimmy hummed noncommittally.

The next day Castiel received a text from Theo, asking to meet.  Just to talk.


	5. Chapter 5

Castiel and Theo met up nearly every other day for the next month.  In that time, it felt to Castiel as though they’d never really broken up.  Theo was just as attentive and loving as he’d always been.  After the second month, Theo asked Castiel to marry him.

“Are you sure you’re not just rushing into this?” Claire asked one day as she helped her uncle pack his belongings.  Cas and Theo had found a small house that was perfect for starting a family.  Castiel was in the process of moving all of his things from the little apartment he’d been living in for the past year. “It could just be the pregnancy hormones talking here.”

Castiel sighed. “No, I’m sure. We were on this track anyway.”

“You mean before the whole secret thing came out?” she quirked an eyebrow.

“I may have been too hasty in passing judgement due to that,” Castiel admitted. “He’s not a bad man, you know.” Castiel lowered himself carefully onto a chair, his heavily gravid state making his movements clumsy.  He got tired much more easily lately.  Jimmy and Amelia would be over after work to continue helping with the packing.

Claire sat on another chair. “Yeah, I guess. But if you hadn’t, I wouldn’t be getting a new little cousin,” she tilted her head and smiled.

Castiel smiled as well.  He let out a slow exhale as the baby shifted and stretched.  He lifted the front of his cotton t-shirt and they watched for a minute as the shape of the baby’s limbs became visible through the taut skin of Castiel’s stomach.  Sometimes, it felt like the unborn infant was trying to actually stand up straight.  He smoothed his hands along the exposed skin, feeling a bruise on one side that had resulted from particularly strong foetal movements, before covering it again.  He saw Claire bite her lip in thought.  He could tell she wanted to say something but was still mustering the courage.  “What’s on your mind, Claire-bear?”

His niece made a face at the old nickname. “Oh, I was just thinking,” she shrugged as though it was trivial.

“About?”

She pursed her lips and sighed before asking “What was he like?”

Castiel blinked. “What?” He tilted his head. “Who?”

“You know,” she shrugged one shoulder and gestured to his stomach. “The father…?”

Castiel took a slow breath, exhaling a sigh. “Oh.”

“I- You… you don’t have to answer. I just…”

“No. It’s okay,” Castiel gave her a small, slightly sad smile. “He was beautiful,” he said after a while. “The most handsome man I’ve ever seen. He was my height, maybe a little taller. Light brown or maybe really dark blonde hair. He had the most intriguing green eyes I’ve ever come across. And he had an adorable dusting of freckles on his face.  Well, not _just_ his face,” he grinned at that.

Claire made a face at the implication but grinned as well, drawing up one foot on her chair and leaning her chin on her knee. “How did you meet?”

Castiel thought back. “I was wandering around along the side of a road and it had started raining. I’ll admit, I had gotten lost and I didn’t even have a jacket. It was just outside some town in southern Illinois that I still can’t remember the name of. I was freezing and wondering how I was going to find my way back to my hotel when this… black, classic muscle car pulled up next to me with its engine roaring. The driver just said, y’know, ‘C’mon, get in. It’s got to be freezing. I doubt this rain’ll let up anytime soon.’ And I almost didn’t. I almost said no.”

“So why did you go?” Claire leaned forward, captivated by the story.

Castiel shrugged helplessly. “It was fucking freezing.” Claire let out a startled laugh. “And, I don’t know, it was like there was something in me just telling me I had to go. So, I got in.”

“And?”

 _“And_ , we talked, sort of. Nothing really personal. And we drove. We drove until the rain got too heavy to see through the windshield and he pulled into the first motel we noticed. I finally got a good look at him and realized he was the hottest man I’d ever met. I have to admit, it was actually a little intimidating at first. I was actually going to try walking to my hotel from there, but I was still lost and there was no way I could catch a cab in that weather, so I stayed.”

“And?”

“And he got us a room.”

_“And??”_

Castiel chuckled. “And I took a chance. I wasn’t completely sure he was interested, but I took a chance… and he was…” Castiel got a far off look in his eyes as he thought back to that night.  It felt like forever ago. “And we made love. All night long.”

 _“All_ night!? What is he, built like an ox?”

“Well, he was able to lift me up pretty easily for round two.”

Claire covered her ears. “Ugh! Too much information! My brain! It’s melting!” Castiel tossed his head back and laughed.  It felt like he hadn’t really laughed in a long time.  Not like this – an actual laugh because he found something funny instead of the result of a mood swing.  It felt good.  As if all the anxiety and worry and anticipation and grief of the last year was finally melting away.

Something occurred to him. “Oh yeah,” he looked over at his niece with a grin. “That tattoo you got on your side?”

“The one we don’t talk about because it doesn’t exist?”

“Yeah, that one. He has it right here,” Castiel indicated the left side of his chest, a few inches below his neck.

“Seriously?” Claire looked thrilled. “I like this guy. Even if he hadn’t had a hand in putting that bun in your oven, I’d still like him.”  The two continued talking and laughing until Jimmy and Amelia joined them.


	6. Chapter 6

Castiel’s due date passed by with no indication that the baby had any intention of coming out.  It was nearing August and his unborn child seemed content to shift around, and stretch, and kick his insides.  From the beginning of his third trimester, the movements of his child prevented him from being able to get a full night’s sleep.  He would shift around himself, unable to find a comfortable position.  And once the baby awoke, it took nearly an hour to calm down again.

Theo let out a tired groan beside him as struggled to push himself into a seated position. “Cas, I gotta work in the morning.”

Cas grunted and manoeuvered to the side of the bed. “I know, I’m sorry. Go back to sleep.”  He levered himself up and carefully made his way out of the room.  After a detour to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs.  He knew his squirming disturbed Theo’s sleep as well and so he’d come down here to sit in his favourite recliner.  The rocking motion usually helped lull the active movements beneath his skin and he could get a few more hours of rest.

On one hand, he was restless and couldn’t wait to give birth.  On the other, he was anxious about how things would change.  What if he wasn’t a good parent?  What if he screwed his kid up?  What if he messed up his relationship with Theo again and wound up alone again, only this time with a baby?

As it always did when he was alone, his thoughts drifted to that night.  _The_ night.  He sighed and pointedly ignored the thrum in his veins that stirred at the memories.  Both Jimmy and Amelia, despite Castiel’s blushing over the subject, assured him that the incredibly horny feeling that hit every so often was completely normal.  He sometimes wished it hadn’t persisted through his _entire_ pregnancy.

He suddenly let out a sob.

He covered his mouth with his hands as his body shook, huge crocodile tears streaming down his face.  He wanted to laugh.  He wanted to scream.  He wanted to throw random shit around and break everything…  Mostly, he just wanted the warm feeling of strong, steady arms around him and softly spoken words in his ear saying everything was going to be okay.

He felt guilty that his brain still played memories of his tryst like reels in his head when he was asleep, even with Theo sleeping right next to him.  He felt lonely during the day when Theo was at work and his family was busy and all he had to do was sit around the house. (He could only clean so many times before he was simply obsessively rearranging everything.  And making dinner only distracted him for so long each day.)

The baby gave a well-aimed kick that had him coughing roughly.  He quickly snatched the tissue box on the side table next to him and cleaned himself up, forcibly calming himself down to regain his breath.  He sighed and settled back into his chair, watching as the ball of his child’s head moved across his stomach.  He was strongly reminded of the movie _Alien_ and snorted.  Claire wasn’t convinced that it _wasn’t_ trying to dig its way out.

Castiel took a slow, calming breath and rubbed soothing circles on his bruised stomach.  Content, for now, to meditate on the slowly settling movements of his precious little gift.

* * *

Castiel had fallen asleep watching old reruns of _The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show_ with Claire.  It was now mid-August, and, after two false alarms that occurred when he was home alone, she’d taken it upon herself to keep her uncle company during the day.  The baby had dropped in the last three weeks, so it was only a matter of time before those false alarms were the real deal.

He started awake, unsure what had woken up.  He shifted in his seat, trying to find a comfortable position.

“You okay over there?” Claire asked from the couch.

“Yeah, I think so.” He focused on the television, which was now playing a documentary on dragon lore around the world.  Sometime later, he felt an uncomfortable pressure in his lower back, and tried to move again to ease it up.  After the third time he squirmed in his seat from the ache, Claire was paying more attention.

“Are you _sure_ you’re okay?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” he assured her.  The next time it happened, it was less an ache and more a cramping pain.  He massaged his back and breathed through it. “Hmm… I’m not sure anymore.”

“I’ll call Dad,” she said and fished her phone out of her purse.

Two hours later found him standing with his arms braced on the back of a chair in a birthing room, groaning in pain as Jimmy wiped his face and neck with a cool cloth.  Claire sat off to the side, flipping through a textbook, and keeping an eye on them in case she was needed.  Amelia and Theo were both at work, and would be for at least another hour, but had been informed that Castiel was, indeed, in labour.

“Did anyone else hear something pop?” he asked suddenly. “I feel like I’m leaking.”

Jimmy snorted. “I think your water just broke.” It all sort of devolved from there for Cas.

“Holy, _sonofa_ -” he let out another long, drawn out, pain filled moan. “How did I ever think this was a good idea?”

“It’s alright, baby bro,” Jimmy said and continued to support him. “I sucks, I know. But, surprisingly, it’s actually worth it.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Claire quipped with a smirk.

“You’re welcome, Honey.”

Cas sighed and straightened up as much as he could, hands on his back as he paced. “I wouldn’t be so sure,” he teased, managing a chuckle despite the pain he was currently in.

“Thanks, Uncle Cas,” Claire smiled cheekily.

“Anytime.” When he sat under a warm shower to try help easing the pain she asked if he’d be more comfortable if she left for a while. “Unless it makes you uncomfortable, I don’t really care who’s in here at this point.”  She huffed a little, an empathetic grin on her face, but stayed.  Castiel wasn’t sure when, he just sort of noticed Amelia was there at some point.

When it came time to push, he was kneeling on the bed, his arms around Jimmy’s neck, with his brother standing next to it directing him to breathe.

All of a sudden, from Castiel’s point of view, all the painful pressure and contracting eased and he sagged against Jimmy’s chest, shaking and feeling incapable of any further movement.  At three minutes after midnight on the 20th of August, weighing 8 pounds and 5 ounces, Matthew Novak _finally_ made his debut into the outside world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Footnote:**  
>  (2) Matthew – Hebrew: Gift of God.


	7. Chapter 7

Castiel just wanted to quickly pop into the convenience store to pick up a few snacks.  It was nearing lunch and he probably should be getting something healthier, but he wanted snack food.  He shut the car door, pulling his jacket more securely around his precious cargo to protect him from the mid November chill, and scurried into the store.  He took a few shuddering breaths, relaxing in the warm air of the store, and went in search of the chips.  His eyes were completely focused on the chip bags as he walked down the aisle when he bumped into someone.

“Oh, I’m so sorr–”

“It’s _you_ ,” the rough voice cut in with stunned recognition.  He looked at the man’s face and gasped, his arms immediately winding protectively around the bundle on his front.

“O-oh!” His blue eyes widened when they met the shade of green that had been invading his dreams ever since that night.

The man’s eyes lowered, his eyebrows shooting up. “You…” he placed the package of beef jerky he held on a random shelf and stepped carefully forward, hand reaching out until he stopped himself, looking back up at Cas. “You had a baby,” he said, voice full of wonder.

Castiel looked down to the baby carrier strapped to his front with a loving smile. “Yes, I did.” His now three-month-old son looked up at him with wide eyes as Cas turned his body enough that the man could get a better look, the baby tilting its head to look in the direction of the stranger.  Castiel watched as the surprise in the man’s expression shifted to include realization.

“Green eyes…”

Castiel swallowed thickly as he watched the man reach out again and place a reverent hand on his child’s head. “U-um, his name’s Matthew.”

“His?” the man asked, turning his gaze from his son to Castiel, hand never leaving Matthew’s head, thumb lightly stroking his head through the woollen cap. “I have a son?” Castiel bit his bottom lip and nodded, eyes beginning to burn.  The man turned his gaze back to their son, a particular shine in his own eyes, and grinned. “Hey there, little man. I’m…” he paused and looked back up at Cas. “I’m Dean. Winchester.”

“Castiel Novak.”

Dean’s mouth curved upwards in a gentle smile. “Have you eaten yet, Cas? I mean, it is almost lunch.”

Castiel’s heart betrayed him and fluttered at hearing the shortened form of his name spoken by that voice, a warm feeling settling in his belly. “No, actually. I haven’t.”

“There’s this diner I passed earlier that is supposed to have the best pie in town,” Dean said, flashing a charming grin. “My treat?”  He knew he shouldn’t.  Dean’s voice interrupted any protest. “Just to talk, I promise,” he said, smile gentle again.

Cas sighed. “Alright.”  They left the convenience store empty handed and Castiel followed Dean’s black classic car in his own, more modern and energy efficient vehicle.

When they’d reached the diner, Dean had met him at his car and offered to retrieve Matthew from his car seat.  Castiel slung the baby bag on his shoulder and smiled as Dean picked up Matthew with ease, speaking to him the entire time as though the infant could understand what he was saying, and carrying him into the diner without bothering with the carrier.  The warm feeling in Cas grew when the waitress commented on how handsome his son, who Dean was still holding, was and how much he looked like his daddy.  Dean had smiled broadly and agreed, thanking her.  He looked so at ease, holding Matthew on his lap, little head nestled in the crook of his arm as he ate.  They talked about little things.  Castiel’s job, which he was still on maternity leave from, and Dean’s car, which he’d rebuilt from the frame up at least once.  Mostly, they talked about Matthew.

Castiel spoke a little bit about his pregnancy, notable cravings and how Matthew hadn’t let him sleep for more than four hours at a time – Dean had good naturedly claimed full responsibility for the latter.  “I bet you looked downright adorable,” Dean grinned and patted his own stomach. “With your tummy all round.” Castiel blushed and took a drink of his iced tea in an attempt to hide his grin.  He stamped down on the mental image of Dean running a hand on his pregnant belly, a grin on his face like the one he aimed at him now.  He shared his favourite memories from the past three months of their son’s life.  Matthew began to get fussy and Dean lifted him up against his chest, pressing his lips to the boy’s head and rubbing his tiny back. “Hey, Buddy. It’s okay. We haven’t forgotten you, I promise.” Matthew responded to Dean’s voice with little coos and whines, rubbing his face against Dean’s chest, his little hands fisting fabric of the man’s plaid flannel shirt. “Yeah?” Dean nodded his head, reacting as though he could understand what the noises his son made meant. “Okay, Bud. Okay.” Dean looked up. “I think he’s getting hungry himself.”

Castiel felt as though his heart was ready to burst at the display.  He looked around the diner for a moment. “We should probably go,” he said as he looked into Dean’s warm eyes. “I haven’t weaned him onto bottles yet and I’m not comfortable breastfeeding in public. I-I know a lot of people don’t mind, and I get that but…”

“No, I get it. It’s a personal choice.” Dean stood and fished out his wallet, going to pay for their meal.  He got Matthew fastened into his car seat as easily as he’d retrieved him from it.  Theo still had trouble trying to figure out how the straps worked and usually left it to Cas to deal with.  When Castiel was first figuring out how the seat anchored into his car, he’d had to call Jimmy to help him figure it out because the older man got too frustrated with it. “Follow me,” he said when Castiel was in the driver’s seat, and went to his own vehicle.  Ignoring the tiny persistent voice in the back of his head cautioning him, he did.  They ended up at a motel that was much the same as the last one they’d been in together. “I hope your fiancé, or husband, or whatever doesn’t get mad. I just… didn’t want to say goodbye just yet,” Dean said as they entered the room, Matthew in his arms again. “I noticed your ring,” Dean offered at Castiel’s startled, questioning look.  He turned the heat up in the room.

Castiel looked at his hand. “Oh, right. Um, fiancé,” he clarified, as he slid off his coat and set it on the chair with the baby bag before taking Matthew in his arms.  He pushed the conflicting emotions he was currently feeling away and focused on his son. “And it’s okay, he’s working and won’t make it back home until after six anyway.” He got Matthew’s winter clothing off and sat against the headboard of the bed, feeling Dean’s eyes on him as he unbuttoned his shirt, revealing his softly swollen breasts, and began nursing.  Theo had been hinting for a while now that he should be thinking about switching Matthew to a bottle, but he enjoyed this time with his son.  He felt like their bond grew stronger with their closeness.  He felt the mattress shift as he switched the baby to his other nipple, unable to feed the infant from one breast like most women would be able to.

“He really is amazing, isn’t he,” Dean’s gruff voice said softly, thick with emotion.  He sat right up next to Castiel, gazing down at his son with wonder painted clearly on his features.

Cas leaned lightly into Dean’s warmth as he brushed a hand on Matthew’s soft, dark baby hair and smiled. “Yes, he certainly is.”  They sat in silence, just watching their little boy until he was finished nursing.  “You’re good with him,” Cas observed, re-buttoning his shirt, as Dean easily burped the infant.  Theo couldn’t get the hang of burping so Castiel preferred to do it himself.  He also preferred Castiel cover himself and Matthew while breastfeeding in the presence of anyone else, including himself, believing it was something that should be kept completely private.  Castiel didn’t mind when strangers were around, but preferred to do without a blanked or other covering while in the privacy of his own home.  He wasn’t sure why, but he’d felt comfortable enough here, with only Dean to witness, not covering himself while nursing their son.

“I’ve known a few people with kids in my time,” he admitted, grinning as the little boy let out a healthy belch. “There we go, Champ.” He held Matthew in the crook of his arm, smiling as tiny hands played with his fingers. “I was with someone for a while, about six or seven years back, that babysat a lot. Got a lot of hands on experience,” he shrugged.  Castiel was content to watch the two as they studied each other.  It wasn’t long before Matthew fell asleep in Dean’s arms… in _his father’s_ arms. “Y’know, I wasn’t purposely looking for you,” Dean said in a low voice.  Castiel started, looking into the man’s eyes once again.  He sighed. “I know you wrote that you didn’t want me to…” Cas felt a pang in his chest and looked down at the bedspread. “But that doesn’t mean I didn’t want to.”  Cas felt his eyes begin to sting and his vision started to blur. _“Cas.”_

“I…” Castiel wiped his face with the back of his hand before looking up. “We should probably go.” Dean looked like he wanted to say something but didn’t.  He exhaled and nodded, and understanding look in his eyes.

They looked at each other, a sad sort of yearning in both of their eyes, as Cas sat in the driver’s seat of his car.  Dean sighed heavily and nodded before shutting the driver’s side door and stepping back.  Castiel nodded back and pulled out of the parking space, driving away from the motel and back to the small house he shared with Theo.  His fiancé was a good man, he was very supportive.  Cas loved him.  Dean had understood.  Castiel swallowed thickly.  He was doing the right thing.

* * *

Castiel groaned as he awoke to the sound of his son crying in the middle of the night.  He glanced at the clock.  Matthew still had a habit of waking them up four hours after he nodded off.  He sighed tiredly and went to sit up when an arm wound around him and pulled him back down.

He whined and a warm pair of lips pressed just behind his ear. “It’s alright, Sweetheart, I got it. Go back to sleep,” the low, rough voice said before he got out of bed.  Castiel sighed and snuggled back into his pillow. _“Hey there, Buddy, what’s the matter?”_ He heard over the slightly static baby monitor. _“Shh, it’s okay. Daddy’s here. Yeah, Daddy’s got you now.”_ The words were interspersed with mewls and grunts from their son. _“I know, Bud, I know. But Mama’s gotta sleep a little bit too. That’s it, you’re okay.”_ Castiel smiled contently.  He was such a wonderful father.

He must’ve fallen back to sleep because the next thing he knew he was being nudged awake. “Cas? Cas. _Cas_.” That voice… it…

Castiel pushed himself up suddenly, gasping as he looked around, confused. “Huh? Wha–” Matthew’s cries sounded from the baby monitor on the nightstand next to him.

“ _Cas_ ,” the voice, a higher pitch than the low rumbling voice he’d just heard speaking to his son, tiredly demanded his attention.  A dream.  He’d been dreaming. “Baby’s awake,” his fiancé grunted irritably.  Castiel groaned a bit and pushed himself up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. “Cas, I have to get to work in the morning,” he persisted.

“Yeah, I know. I’m going.” Castiel stood and grabbed the baby monitor so the noise wouldn’t disturb his fiancé further, stumbling a little as he went into the nursery.  He put the monitor on the table in the hall just outside the nursery door. “Hey Little Bee,” he said as he reached into the crib and lifted his irritated little boy into this arms. “There, there, Mama’s here. Mama’s right here.” His diaper wasn’t dirty so he sat on the rocking chair and tried nursing.  Matthew continued squirming and crying.  Castiel held him close, kissing his head and rocking. “What’s the matter, Sweetheart? You lonely?”  He began softly singing a song he remembered his mother singing to him and his brother whenever they were upset and rocked until Matthew’s cries subsided.

 _Baby, sleep gently sleep._  
_Life is long and love is deep._  
_Time will be sweet for thee._  
_All the world to see._  
_Time to look about and know,_  
_How the shadows come and go._  
_How the breeze stirs the trees,_  
_How the blossoms grow._

He continued rocking after the infant fell back asleep and let his mind wander.

The dream he’d been having had been rather wonderful.  At the same time he felt a great deal of guilt.  He was lying in bed next to his fiancé and he was _still_ having these dreams.  Dreams of what ifs.  Of wondering.  What would have happened if Dean had found them earlier?  What if he hadn’t walked out on him that morning and disappeared?

What if Theo hadn’t come back?

Castiel looked at his hand where the engagement ring sat.  It felt heavy in a way it hadn’t before.  Castiel shook his head and scoffed at himself.  He held his son closer to him and sighed.  Theo was a good man.  Yes, he’d lied and that lie had destroyed a great deal of Castiel’s hopes and dreams… but that didn’t matter now.  He had everything he’d ever wanted right here in his arms.  Theo was willing to accept another man’s child.  When they’d gotten back together, he’d been supportive through the last two months of Castiel’s pregnancy, and he was supportive when Castiel had brought the baby home from the hospital.  He was a good, caring man.  He’ll be a good father, and a loving husband…

But Castiel’s mind betrayed him.  Because, what if…?

* * *

Castiel hummed contently, lying on his back the weight of his fiancé pressing him down into the mattress.  Theo claimed his mouth in a full, heated kiss.  Hands sliding up Castiel’s shirt.  Cas gasped and sighed as Theo trailed his lips down his neck.  It wasn’t often that they were able to be close like this.  His son had been born four months ago and they’d only really started becoming physical in the past six weeks, and they hadn’t progressed beyond some light petting.

Theo was just beginning to pull Castiel’s shirt up when the sound of Matthew starting to cry sounded through the baby monitor.  Cas pushed lightly against Theo in an effort to get up. “Theo, the baby.” Theo continued to nibble on Castiel’s neck. “Theo, come on, he’s crying.”

“Let him,” Theo grumbled offhandedly, pushing more firmly into Cas. “He’s gotta get used to it some time.”

“Theo, come on. Move, he needs me.” Castiel pushed harder against Theo’s larger frame, putting some distance between them.  Matthew’s cries became more insistent. _“Move.”_

 _“Ahh.”_ Theo let out a frustrated growl and pushed himself off the bed completely. _“Fine._ You’re going to spoil that kid if you keep this up.”

Castiel didn’t flinch, but he was noticeably startled.  He scrambled off the bed as Matthew began crying louder, rushing into the nursery. “It’s alright, Matty. I’m right here,” he said as he scooped the squalling infant into his arms, holding him close. “Mama’s here. You’re okay, Sweetheart.” He pressed kisses to his son’s head and breathed in his scent, rubbing a soothing hand on his back as the baby calmed down.  He sat on the rocking chair with his son and spoke softly to him, just cuddling until the little boy eventually cried himself to sleep.

Castiel stayed in the nursery, just holding his son, for a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Footnote:**  
>  (3) I have Castiel reiterate the sentiment that Theo is a good man a lot. It’s intentional on my part. He uses it to excuse a lot of Theo’s (at the very least) less than supportive behaviours.  
> (4) I think I may have turned Theo into a bigger dick than originally planned…  
> (5) Ivy’s Lullaby from M. Night Shyamalan’s movie _The Village._


	8. Chapter 8

_“Dammit!”_ Castiel growled in frustration as he kicked the side of his car.  It was getting dark and he was running late enough as it was when his car broke down on the side of the road just far enough away from any shops or houses to make it difficult on him.  And, to make matters more irritating, his chest was beginning to feel uncomfortable, the pressure of needing to either nurse or use a breast pump was going to become even more uncomfortable and he just knew he was going to start leaking. _‘Six to ten weeks, my ass,’_ he grumbled in his head.  He envied those who only had to endure wet spots on their shirts for that long.  He sighed.  He’d have to call a tow-truck and then– he heard a honk behind him as car with a roaring engine pulled up just behind his.  He sighed in relief as the driver got out.

“What’s a pretty thing like you doing in a dump like this?” The man grinned in an overly flirtatious manner.  Castiel snorted and rolled his eyes. “Car trouble?” he asked unnecessarily.

“What are you doing here, Dean?”

Dean shrugged. “Was just passing through. Saw an angel in distress and thought I’d lend a hand.”

“Angel?” Castiel raised an eyebrow.  He wasn’t sure where this banter was coming from but he wasn’t in a mood to complain.  Especially if it got him out of here sooner.

“Let’s see what we got here,” Dean said as he approached the front of the car. “Wanna pop the hood?” Dean fiddled around with the engine and tried explaining what the problem was but he may have been speaking a different language for all the good it did.  Castiel understood numbers, not mechanics. “Sorry, Sweetheart, but you’re going to have to get this Barbie car to a shop,” he said at last and shut the hood. “It’s gonna need more than a patch job to get it running.”

“Barbie car? I bet I get at least three times more miles to the gallon than that gas guzzler you got there,” Castiel protested with a smirk.

“Hey, don’t you be talking about Baby like that,” Dean smirked back. “Ol’ girl’s got some serious mileage in her yet. Speaking of, where’s Matty today?”

Castiel felt a thrill of happiness run through him at the affectionately spoken nickname. “He’s with the babysitter. And I’m running late to pick him up. She gets very irritated with me when I’m late.” He sighed and scrubbed at his tired face with his hands.

“Here, let’s get this car seat set up in my car and go pick up our boy,” Dean said and set about transferring said car seat into the back of his Impala.  Castiel wouldn’t have thought it could work out as a family car, but Dean easily to the car seat secured into the back.  Castiel gathered the important items from his car, locking it, and settled into the passenger seat of Dean’s.

The babysitter was indeed irritated.  Castiel had had a late work day to begin with and it was now even later in the evening.  This was tempered a bit when Dean gave her a generous tip for the overtime.  Matthew seemed happy to see Dean and the six-month-old snugged into the man’s chest rubbing his tired eyes.  Something Castiel had never seen him do to Theo.  He led Dean up the stairs to his apartment.

“So, what, Leo can’t help you out when you run late?” Dean asked, a frown on his face as Castiel unlocked the door and led him inside.  His tone suggested he didn’t like the man.

 _“Theo_ and I broke up, so he wouldn’t be much help in the matter,” Castiel replied wryly as he shed his trench coat and suit jacket, hanging them up in the tiny closet by the front door, toeing out of his shoes.

“Really now?” Dean asked interestedly. “I mean, I’m sorry you two broke up and all.”

Castiel gave a small smile and lifted his tired boy into his arms.  When his son didn’t start immediately tugging at the front of his shirt, as he always did when he was hungry, he decided on giving him his bath first. “It’s okay. We weren’t as compatible as I’d originally thought we were.”

“How long?” Dean followed him into the bathroom.

“About a month ago,” Castiel explained and began gathering what he needed for his son’s bath. “Turned out, he didn’t really want to be a father after all… I don’t think he was all that cut out for it, honestly.” Dean wordlessly lifted the little boy out of his arms again and began undressing him out of his day wear as Castiel set up the tub.  He set a laundry basket, with a towel inside to prevent the baby from slipping, in the water with a few bath toys and sat on the edge of the tub as Dean kneeled next to it, placing Matthew in the basket.  Castiel smiled softly (despite this only being the second time he’d watched the two of them together, he felt like he smiled a lot more when the other man was around) as the two bathed their little boy together – both getting splashed a bit as Matty played in the water.  After, he watched contently, leaning against the side of the crib, with a small, tired smile still on his face as Dean dressed his son in soft footie pyjamas with cartoon dinosaurs on the front.  He was so good with Matthew.

Castiel was brought out of his musings when Dean spoke. “Is he still nursing?” Matthew was beginning to hungry cry.  Castiel’s chest was now aching in earnest.

“Oh, uhm, sort of. I mean, he still seems to like to when we’re home. I’ve had to wean him onto bottles since I’ve started back at work, but he doesn’t seem to be put off actually nursing.”  Castiel removed his tie, setting it on the changing table, and unbuttoned his shirt and nursing undershirt – which had nursing pads attached to the inside – as he sat on the rocking chair that just fit in the small room.

“Here we go,” Dean said as he eased the tired, fussing baby into Castiel’s arms.  The hungry baby easily latched on and Dean chuckled. “Someone’s hungry today,” he said over his son’s noisy suckling.  They were content to simply watch their son.  Dean’s hand softly brushing along the little boy’s hair as he rested against the arm of the rocking chair.

When Matthew had finally fallen asleep, after fighting it, Castiel watched Dean gently place their son in his crib. Dean pulled the tired Castiel out of the chair and led him from the nursery.

“Now _you_ look like you could definitely use some sleep as well.”

Castiel sighed, trying in vain to stifle a yawn. “Yes, I suppose I could. You know, he _still_ refuses to sleep for longer than four hours at a time? He wakes me up at least twice a night.”

Dean looked a little sheepish. “You really look beat. Why don’t you go lay down, take a nap yourself? I’ll fix something for you to eat if you get hungry tonight.”

“You don’t have to do that, Dean,” Castiel protested even as he veered towards his bedroom.

“It’s fine, Cas. I don’t mind,” he insisted.  Castiel drifted off as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Castiel woke with a small groan, lifting his head to look at the time.  He wasn’t surprised to find that it was exactly four hours later.  He could hear his son’s cries through the baby monitor and began to push himself up when a voice drifted through the monitor’s speakers.  He lowered himself back down and listened.

 _“Hey there, Buddy. C’mere… Now, what’s wrong? Need a new diaper? … no, not the diaper. Now, I know you can’t be hungry just yet, I was there when your Mama fed you… heh, this chair isn’t too bad, hey Bud? It’s actually pretty comfy. No wonder you and your Mama seem to like it so much…”_ Castiel heard a rumbling chuckle. _“You’re looking at me like ‘who the hell are you?’ – whoops, don’t tell your Mama I’ve been cursing around you. You’ll get Daddy into trouble…”_ Castiel’s heart thudded in his chest. _“Hmm… I realize you probably don’t remember me, Matty, but we’ve met before.  Once.  You were smaller, and you could barely hold your own head up… I didn’t exactly get the chance to introduce myself properly that time. I’m Dean Winchester. I’m not sure if your Mama ever told you, but I’m your Father… but if I could, I’d really want to be your Dad.”_ Castiel’s eyes watered and he couldn’t keep the small, yearning smile from his face. _“If your Mama would let me, that is…_

 _“I can’t promise I’ll be there every day, Matty. I want to, I really do, but my job is kind of important. Like, world changing important. So I’ll be travelling a lot. But if your Mama lets me, I can promise I’ll be here as much as I possibly can…”_ Dean exhaled audibly in a huff, but Castiel could clearly hear the teasing in his voice. _“What, am I boring you already? Hey? You getting bored with your old man already? …that’s alright, Lil Man. You need the rest. You can’t keep waking your Mama up every four hours every night. God himself knows I’m up after four hours, but your Mama needs the rest. He works really, really hard and he loves you so much… and you know what? I do too… So you go ahead and go back to sleep, let your Mama get a bit more rest, okay?”_ Castiel sniffed.  He really was a wonderful man.  A wonderful father.

He really hoped Dean meant what he said.  What he’d promised their son.

Castiel really wanted him to mean it.

He was woken up some time later to the sound of Matthew’s cries, which were much louder than normal.  He pushed himself into a seated position, confused as he saw Dean carrying their crying son into the room, looking apologetic.

“Sorry, I think he’s actually hungry this time.” Castiel felt much more rested this time and simply pulled off his sleep shirt and reached out for the baby.  He didn’t even think about the fact that he was currently half naked in front of Dean, who was still technically a stranger to him.  He settled against his pillows and cradled his son close.  When the bed dipped beside him, he snuggled into the warmth of the strong body next to him as Dean wrapped and arm around him, pulling him close.  He pulled his shirt back on as Dean burped the baby again.  The three settled down in the bed, Matthew snuggled in between them, and Castiel refused to think about the whole thing.  He simply allowed himself to enjoy the moment and drifted back to sleep.

He woke up first.  He didn’t push down or ignore the small flutter in his belly and warmth in his chest as he studied Dean’s sleeping form.  Matthew was tucked right into the man’s side, Dean’s black t-shirt clutched tightly in his little fist.  The warmth in his chest shifted to an ache.

He wanted this.  He wanted it _so badly_.

He didn’t care that the two barely even knew each other.  They’d met a total of three times now.  They shared a son, but they didn’t really know anything about each other.  Yes, Dean knew that he was an accountant, and he knew that Dean travelled a lot, but that was the extent of it.  He didn’t know what Dean did for a living.  They didn’t know anything about each other’s families, or anything personal.  He knew, from their last encounter, that Dean loved pie.  It was obvious from his car that he was a great mechanic and cared about the vehicle.  Everything about him, from his clothes to his demeanor, suggested that he worked very hard at whatever it was he did and that he was a kind, caring individual that would do anything for those he cared for.  And he absolutely adored Matthew.

He wanted this.

They ate breakfast together, Matthew getting a kick out of Dean treating the spoon like an aeroplane.  Castiel was trying to introduce the concept of a sippy cup with a little water, which the six-month-old treated more like a toy to bang on the tray of his high chair, and ended up having to change his shirt again when most of the liquid ended up all over him.  He was pleased to find that, while he’d been sleeping, Dean had arranged for his car to be towed to a garage and would be ready by the end of the day.  With a small amount of hesitation, he left Matthew in Dean’s care instead of his babysitter when he went to work.  Matty was all smiles and laughter by the time he returned home.  Castiel’s heart swelled.

He wanted this.

At the end of the second day, Dean had to hit the road again.  He looked torn about it as he stared at Cas, Matthew on his hip.  Castiel offered a small, understanding smile and stepped into his arms.  They shared a slow, comfortable kiss.  When he pulled back, Cas cupped a hand on Dean’s cheek and stared into his eyes. “Come back,” he stated simply. “Come back to us.” He pressed a more pointed kiss to the man’s lips before letting him go.  He moved Matty’s arm to wave bye-bye and the watched as the black Chevy drove away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Footnotes:**  
>  (6) According to my research, breastfeeding mothers generally tend to experience leaking breasts for around 6-10 weeks, but some can in fact experience it for months.  
> (7) I may have pushed the four hour sleeping thing a little too much, but I like it.


	9. Chapter 9

Over the following months Castiel and Matthew welcomed an infrequent visitor into their home.  After the first night the three had slept together in bed, Dean never returned to the couch he’d started on before Matty had woken up that second time.  More often than not, Castiel woke up in the middle of the night and the events of the dream he’d had after first running into Dean in the convenience store played out in some manner.  He would sigh and snuggle into bed, surrounded by a scent that was completely Dean, and curl into the warmth of the strong body next to him.

The more he saw how Dean interacted with their son, how hands-on Dean was as a father, the more he realized how unsupportive his ex-fiancé had actually been.  Theo had never really voluntarily interacted with Matthew, and he was easily irritated by the small infant.  From the first moment he’d laid eyes on his son, Dean had been smitten.  It was like he couldn’t help out enough.  If Matthew needed anything, Dean didn’t hesitate to get it, from diapers to clothing to new toys.  If something needed doing, he did it without question or complaint and he never lost his patience with the little boy.  And Matty loved him just as much.

The more he got to know the father of his child, the stronger he felt about the man.  It was no longer an indescribable attraction.  He wasn’t completely sure what it was that the man did for a living, only that it involved going after bad people and saving ones in need.  He knew the man had a close-knit family, with a brother (who had certain mental health issues stemming from severe psychological trauma) and two more adopted siblings.  And he was opening up to Dean about how his relationship with Theo had been, and how much he had come to realize it had changed – especially after Matthew was born.  While he hadn’t been sure, in the beginning, what was attracting him to this man or even if he should be pursuing a relationship with him at all, he was slowly finding himself relaxing into his company.  The yearning he felt no longer had a desperate edge to it.  He contentedly wanted and welcomed.  And while their physical relationship had graduated to stolen make out sessions, slowly verging on heavy petting, when they could get a few hours alone, there was no actual rush for anything more.

It was now Matthew’s first birthday and, as it was mid-August and the weather was fair, Castiel held the little party at the outdoor park that his baby group favoured.  Castiel sat at the edge of the sandbox, speaking with a couple other mothers while their children played in the sand when Matthew started shouting and trying to scramble out of the sand. “Dada! Dada!” Cas helped his little boy out of the sandbox and watched as he clumsily ran towards Dean as the man approached.

“Hey there, Bud,” Dean said, a wide, bright smile on his face as he scooped up the little boy. “How’s my birthday boy?”  Castiel smiled as he caught up to them at a more sedate pace.

“You made it,” Castiel said and Dean wrapped an arm around his waist, tucking him into his side.

“’Course I did. I wasn’t going to miss this day twice in a row.” His expression took on a shade of regret that quickly passed.  His attention returned to their son as the little boy started babbling to his father.  Castiel took the bag from Dean’s hand and placed it with the other gifts.  He felt a pang of jealousy when he noticed how most of the other mothers were now staring at Dean, dressed in a dark pair of jeans and a white, blue and brown plaid button up with the sleeves rolled up on his muscular arms, just the right amount of scruff on his face.  They all knew Castiel lived alone with his son, and that Dean stopped in frequently but never stayed for long.  Sometimes he’d be there for a couple days, sometimes he’d only be able to manage a few hours.  But he always came back, and his affections never wavered.

“Hi, I’m Evelyn,” a perky brunette introduced herself to Dean, invading his personal space.  Twin sets of green eyes blinked at her.

“Dean,” he nodded, turning his attention back to Matthew when he started babbling again.

“I haven’t seen _you_ around here before,” Evelyn interrupted, speaking over Matthew’s voice.  Castiel frowned at the way she pushed her chest out, accentuating her breasts a bit.

“I travel a lot,” Dean offered with an indulgent grin.

“This little one seems to like you,” she said in an obviously flirtatious manner, running her fingers along Dean’s bared forearm.

“Oh this is just painful,” Jackson muttered from his seat at the table where the gifts were, his daughter ran up to him and climbed in his lap.  He caught Castiel’s gaze and rolled his eyes.

“I bet you would be really great with children.” Dean was beginning to look distinctly uncomfortable but was trying to remain cordial with the woman.

“I think that’s one of the things I like most about you Dean,” Castiel said from his spot by the table. “How really great you’d be with children. Maybe you should have one of your own. You know, kind of like _our son_.” Jackson snorted and Evelyn at least had the decency to blush.  Castiel walked up to them. “What do you think, Matty? Should we keep Daddy?” Matthew giggled and babbled some more. “I think that’s a ‘yes’,” Castiel smiled and pressed a short, chaste kiss to Dean’s lips.  The man grinned wolfishly and pulled Castiel close, planting a somewhat less chaste kiss on Cas’s lips.

Castiel grinned back. “I think it’s time for cake.” He turned and went back to the table where the cooler with the birthday cake sat. “Who’s ready for cake?” he asked in a louder voice.

Dean sat beside Cas with Matthew on his lap and helped show the little boy how to blow out the single candle.  It was hard to say who was more amused over Dean’s gift: a little tan trench coat that perfectly matched the one Castiel wore all the time.  Dean had laughed heartily at the quip ‘baby in a trench coat’, even coaxing a laugh out Castiel at the decidedly corny joke.

This time, he stayed for over a week.


	10. Chapter 10

Four months later, just a little over two weeks before Chrstmas, Dean was on a case with Charlie in Athens, Ohio.  It had turned out to be a soul eater, which Dean had encountered before with Bobby – _that_ time had been connected to a case he’d once worked on with a crotchety old hunter named Rufus Turner.  Dean wasn’t sure why he still did the rock-paper-scissors thing to decide on who gets to do what – sure, with Sam he’d been able to use it to his advantage and tended to let his brother win so that Dean always ended up doing the more dangerous part of the job – since Charlie _always_ won and got to pick what to do, no matter what he chose.  Charlie had opted to go into the soul eater’s nest to paint the required sigil that matched the one Dean painted in the real world.

They were just leaving the house after explaining to the family that lived in the house that they weren’t to disturb the sigil in the living room, and assuring them they were now safe, when Dean received a call.  The caller ID was Cas.  Dean grinned and moved a little bit away from Charlie to answer.  So far, only three people knew about Cas and Matty: Bobby, Linda, and Henry (or the “grown-ups” as they were often referred to).  They’d cornered him the week after his son’s first birthday, concerned about where he’d disappeared off to for so long, despite him checking in every couple of days.  He was sure that the rest were beginning to suspect something was up.

“Hey, Cas, how’s-”

_“Dean.”_

Dean stopped, suddenly tense.  Castiel sounded stressed, and scared.  He could hear Matty crying in the background. “What’s wrong?”

_“I-I don’t know. Something’s in the house.”_

Dean was already rushing to the car, waving Charlie in. “I’m on my way.”

_“Dean, please. Hurry.”_

“I’ll be there as soon I can, Cas, I promise.” Charlie scrambled for purchase as Dean peeled out.

* * *

It was about six-and-a-half hours to Pontiac, Illinois.  Despite the winter weather conditions, Dean made it in four.  He’d received a second call about halfway there, this one was from Castiel’s brother, Jimmy:

 _“Is this Dean Winchester?”_ a familiar, but strange sounding voice asked.

“Yeah, who’s this?” He asked as he navigated past a few cars.

_“This is Jimmy Novak, I’m Castiel’s brother.”_

“Where’s Cas? Is Matty okay?”

_“Matthew’s fine, but Cas is in the hospital. He’s unconscious but stable, but that’s not the main reason I’m calling.”_

“What’s wrong?”

_“It’s child services. For some reason, they’re refusing to release Matthew into my care, despite the fact that I **know** Cas has me, **and** my wife and daughter listed as acceptable guardians in case of an emergency. They say they’ll only release him to a legal parent, and Cas… They keep spewing some crap about policy… Dean, they’ve already placed him in a foster home and won’t tell us where he is.”_

“I’m on my way there, I shouldn’t be more than a few hours. I’ll meet you at the hospital. Which one is he at?” When he hung up, he had Charlie google directions to the hospital.

“Dean?” she asked carefully as he continued to speed along the highway. “Who are Cas and Matty? What’s going on?”

“Cas… Castiel Novak. He’s my boyfriend. Matthew is our son.”

Charlie was, understandably, shocked. “You have a son? I mean, I figured you had something going on with someone special, but… when were you going to tell us?”

Dean sighed, tiredly. “I wasn’t going to keep it a secret forever, it’s just… Cas doesn’t know about this life. I just, I dunno, wanted to keep that part of my life separate for a little while. I didn’t want to taint it with the crap we see every day.” He chanced a glance at her.  She was smiling at him, complete understanding in her face.

“So,” she said after a few minutes. “How long have you two been doing-the-do?”

Dean grinned, despite the anxiety threatening to take hold. “We’re not… it’s not like that. We, well we sort of happened upon each other almost two years ago­-”

 _“Two years?_ You’ve been seeing this guy for two years and you didn’t-”

“Hey, do you want me to explain this or not?” She snapped her mouth shut and sat back.  She even mimed zipping her lips shut and putting an invisible lock on them, pocketing the key. “It was a one-night-only kind of deal. I picked up on the side of the road in the middle of a rainstorm.  He was all alone, not even a coat. Rain got so bad, we got stranded in a motel for the night. We didn’t even get each other’s names. It was the single best night of my life.”

She scrambled to unlock her mouth, leaning forward. “Night, as in _all night?_ ”

Dean grinned wolfishly. “Oh yeah.” He held up four fingers.

 _“Four times!?”_ She sat back again, clearly impressed. “I didn’t think you still had it in you.”

“Hey,” he protested. “You wanna hear the rest of it?” She held up her hands in surrender and relocked her lips. “So, he was gone the next morning, a note on the table and his tie on the floor.” He sighed at the memory. “It was a little over a year later that I accidentally ran into him again when I was stopping for junk food.” A small smile made its way to his lips. “He was just as beautiful as I remembered… stormy blue eyes, messy brown hair… then I realized he had a baby.” Dean chuckled. “I was surprised, and when I looked into those big green eyes, I just _knew_. It was mine. I was a father.”

_“Aww…”_

“I took him to lunch and we talked a bit.  We spent a few hours together, talked mostly about Matty.  I swear, the only time I let my son go was when he was nursing…” he sighed again. “But Cas was engaged. He was happy, starting a family. My boy was going to have a normal life. So, this time, _I_ left.” They drove in silence for a time. “Three months later, I was driving through Pontiac and I just happened to come across him, stranded on the side of the road. _Again._ His car broke down and he was late picking Matty up from the babysitter, so I put the car seat in Baby and we went and got him. Turns out, he and the fiancé had broken up and he was raising Matty alone. I stayed for a couple days, helped out with Matty. After that, I just couldn’t stay away. There’s just something about him, I can’t explain. And our son is just amazing. That kid is so smart.”

Charlie watched him, dopey grin on his face as he gushed about his little boy and the man who’d stolen his heart.  She hoped everything worked out once they reached Pontiac.


	11. Chapter 11

Dean rushed into the hospital, heading straight for the room number Jimmy had texted him, Charlie practically running to keep up with him.  When he neared the room he saw a man who looked almost exactly like Cas arguing with another man who was about Sam’s height.

“-know why you’re even here,” Jimmy practically growled at the man towering over him.

“I love him, Jimmy,” the man stated. “I always have.”

“Well you’ve done a piss poor job of showing it over the past few years,” Jimmy spat.  It was beginning to look like whatever argument they were having was about to come to blows.

“Everything alright here, gentlemen?” Dean loudly interrupted.

“It’s none of your business, pal,” the taller man shot at him.

“Dean.” Jimmy looked relieved at the sight of him and moved away from the rude guy and towards him and Charlie. “You got here quicker than I expected.”

“Who’s this guy?” Gigantor demanded.

“I could ask the same about you,” Dean glared. “And I ain’t your pal, pal.” He turned back to Jimmy. “How’s Cas?”

“He’s-”

“How do _you_ know Cas?”

Jimmy ignored him. “Cas is doing better. Still out, but he’s improved.”

“And Matty?”

“Who the hell are you? What the hell do you want with Cas and the kid?”

“Look, I don’t care who the hell you are, and I really don’t need to be answering any of your damn questions. But I’ll throw you a bone. I’m Cas’ boyfriend and _the kid_ is my son.”

The man scoffed. “What, that little whore con you into playing house too?”

“You son of a bitch, you want to say that again?” Dean snarled, getting into the guy’s face. “Wait, what does he mean ‘too’?” Dean aimed the second question at Jimmy.

“This is Theo,” Jimmy introduced. “Cas’ ex.”

“Oh, okay.” Dean plastered a fake smile on his face and slugged the ginormous douche, making him stagger. “Nice to meet you, asshat.”

Theo looked thunderous. He started towards Dean. “You mothe-” Whatever Theo had been about to say was cut off when Charlie rushed forward and knocked him on his ass with a roundhouse kick to the gut.  Dean was suddenly yanked into a room as Charlie started whaling on the guy, both of them shouting obscenities.  Seconds later, a security team arrived and had to pull her off him.  She was escorted out of the hospital and he was escorted to the emergency room.

In Dean’s opinion, it was only by some miracle that they hadn’t thrown him out as well, seeing as he’d been the one to throw the first punch.  As it was, he wasn’t going to be pointing that out anytime soon.

As soon as Charlie and Theo were gone, a nurse and doctor came to check on Cas’ vitals.  He was still improving, and it was at a point where they just needed to wait until he wakes up on his own.  As soon as they left, Dean spoke, eyes glued to Castiel’s unconscious form. “What happened?”

“I don’t really know. All I know is that one of Cas’ new neighbour was dropping by to introduce herself and heard Matthew crying. She let herself in and found Cas lying on the floor in the entry hallway. He apparently hit his head on something and was knocked out. I was called as soon as he was admitted. I immediately asked about Matty and, well you know what happened.”

“Who do I have to call about trying to get my son?”

Jimmy got the number he needed for the case worker. “You won’t have to try too hard,” he said.  Dean finally looked at him, a question in his eyes. “You’re listed on the birth certificate. He had it updated not long after Matty’s birthday. Was going to tell you closer to Christmas.”

* * *

Dean walked up to the foster home just two steps behind the Child Services rep, his anxious nerves making him feel jittery.  There were only two things that could possibly even begin to help ease him: Cas and Matthew.  At the moment, he could hear the heartbreaking sound of his little boy’s cries for his Mama.

 _“Dada!”_ A warm smile lit up his face as tiny hands reached for him over the safety gate that separated the living room from the rest of the house as soon as watery green eyes caught sight of him. “Dada!”

“Hey there, Bud,” he said soothingly as he scooped up his son into his arms, holding him close. “There we go, it’s okay.” He continued to speak in a soothing tone, rubbing a hand in circles on Matthew’s back. “Daddy’s here, you’re okay.” He pressed a kiss to the small head and rocked the sniffling toddler.  He let everything else fall into the background as his focus lay solely on his son.

When all the pertinent details were taken care of, he got Matthew in his car seat – he’d stopped by Cas’ house switch cars, leaving Baby in front of Cas’ house – and drove over to Jimmy’s house with his son and Charlie.  He didn’t want to leave his son so soon, but he needed to check out Castiel’s new house.  He and Matthew had just finished moving in the previous day, and Dean had an inkling of what was going on.  He wasn’t going to bring his son back into the house if it was anything that he thought it could be.

“Not that I’m complaining, at all. I mean, the guy had it coming, but why’d you go after him so hard? Which I’m impressed with, by the way,” Dean spoke as they entered the house.  Jimmy had given him the key when he explained that he wanted to check the entire house.

“What? I figured if they were more focused on _me_ , they wouldn’t kick _you_ out.”

“Fair enough.”

“So you got that look in your eye,” Charlie commented. “You think there’s a case here?”

Dean sighed, mulling over his thoughts. “When Cas called, he said that there was something in the house. Not some _one_ , some _thing_. Jimmy had no clue what could have happened, but I got the feeling that everyone believes it was an accident. Call Kevin, see if they can dig up anything on the address”

He pulled the car into the driveway and went to his car to get the basic tool kit out of the trunk – a duffle that had all the basics: salt, iron, holy water, a couple shotguns, a supply of salt rounds, etcetera.  Kevin, Henry, and Sam (who was having a good day) were researching anything they could find on Castiel’s new house through the internet.  He was pretty sure they were dealing with a vengeful spirit, but he wanted to check himself while the “nerd squad” did their thing.

“Let’s see what we’re dealing with,” he said and they entered the house.  They armed themselves with a shotgun each.  He paused when he saw a pool of blood on the floor.

“This must be where Cas went down,” Charlie commented.  They started searching the place. Dean took the main floor and Charlie went upstairs.  They both checked the basement.  They returned to the front hall, finding nothing out of the ordinary.

“This is odd,” Dean said as he looked around.  There were boxes everywhere, Castiel not having a chance to unpack anything.

“I dunno,” Charlie shrugged. “Maybe it’s works on a timer? Kind of like a highway ghost?”

“Maybe,” he conceded, going to pack his shotgun away. “Well, I better get back to my son. He was pretty upset whe-”

“Dean!”

The dirty image of a teenage girl suddenly appeared and rushed Dean, throwing him hard against the door.  It disappeared momentarily, reappearing on the stairs just in front of the door, arm reaching out.  Charlie didn’t hesitate to lift the shotgun she still held and fired a salt round into the apparition.

“Dean, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he snagged the duffle and wrenched open the door. “Let’s go.” They just managed to escape when the door slammed shut behind them. “Yep. It’s a ghost.” He rolled the shoulder that had slammed into the door, wincing as a pain shot through it.  It wasn’t dislocated though, so he didn’t spare it any thought.  They’d just gotten in the car when Charlie’s cell rang.

“Lay it on me, nerds,” she said by way of greeting, putting it on speaker.

 _“There are a few incidents dating back about six decades of people either being severely injured or dying in that house,”_ Kevin’s voice replied from the phone.

 _“It seems as though all of the families that were negatively affected had children,”_ Henry’s voice cut in. _“And all the people effected were parents.”_

 _“I got a record of a particular family,”_ Sam continued. _“It’s the only one where the victim **wasn’t**_ _a parent, or even an adult. And it seems to be the first recorded case for the house dated 1954. Apparently a sixteen-year-old girl named Tanya Evans was found dead by suicide. From what I can tell, there were rumours about possible abuse in the home but investigations turned up nothing.”_

“Maybe that’s why she went after you,” Charlie said.  If it were possible, there would be a lightbulb floating above her head. “She didn’t even show up until you mentioned your son.”

 _“Wait, what?”_ Sam started.  At the same time Henry said _“Is Matthew alright?”_

Charlie made what could only be described as an ‘oops’ face. “Sorry,” she said bashfully.

Dean huffed and waved if off. “Matty’s fine. Cas’ in the hospital. She went after him earlier today… or yesterday… what time is it?”

 _“Is Castiel injured badly?”_ Henry asked.  Kevin could be heard in the background asking _“Who’s Cas?”_

“He hit his head pretty hard, and he’s unconscious, but doctor says he should be fine once he wakes up.” Dean rubbed his forehead and exhaled audibly. “Any idea where this Tanya chick is buried?”

* * *

Castiel groaned.  He felt drowsy and his head hurt.  Something was niggling at his brain but he couldn’t remember what.  It was important.  He had to get Matthew and get away.  _Matthew…_   He gasped and tried to push himself upright, but his head started spinning and he felt hands holding him, helping him lay back down.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, Cas. It’s alright. You’re fine.”

“D-Dean?” he croaked, his voice sounding rougher than normal.  He looked bleary eyed to his side and found the man he’d come to love more than any other, save his son, sitting in a chair looking for all the world like he’d slept in said chair.  Dean poured a cup of water from a pitcher and placed a straw in it before readjusting the hospital bed so Cas was mostly upright and helping him drink.  The cool liquid soothed Castiel’s dry throat. “Where’s Matty? Is he okay?”

“Matty’s fine, Sweetheart. He’s at your brother’s. My sister is with them and I think he’s taken a shine to her.”

Cas sighed in relief.  He lifted a shaking hand to his forehead and just breathed. “I was so scared, Dean.” He felt tears stinging his eyes. “I was so scared that Matty would get hurt.”

Dean got up and sat on the bed next to his distraught boyfriend, pulling the man into his arms. “I know, and I’m sorry I wasn’t here.”

Cas choked a humourless laugh. “What could you have done? It was…” He shook his head. “God, I don’t even know what it was. It was _insane_. _I’m_ insane. It’s just not possible.”

“What do you remember?”

“It was… Now, I know this is going to sound crazy, but… it was a girl. A teenage girl. But, there was something… off about her. She… this is going to sound _completely_ insane, but she wasn’t human. I swear. I know what I saw and-”

“She was a ghost.”

“-she jus- wait, what?”

Dean sighed. “She was a ghost,” he said again. “The girl. Her name was Tanya Evans and she was a sixteen-year-old girl who was abused, _badly_ , by her parents.” Cas remained silent and just stared at him. “Her spirit got trapped in the house where she, most likely, died and she turned vengeful. Her resentment of her own parents made her hate _all_ parents. It’s why she attacked you. You’re a parent.” He shifted his sore shoulder.

“What happened to you?”

“Charlie and I went to check out your house. I kinda figured I knew what it was and we needed to be sure. When she realized that I was also a parent, she went after me.”

“…how do you know all this?”

Dean swallowed thickly, suddenly nervous.  What if Cas didn’t believe him?  What if he reacted the way his ex-girlfriend Cassie reacted and left?  What if he never got to see Matthew again?

“Dean?” Cas was now looking at him with concern.

Dean sighed again. “It’s what I do.”

“What?”

“My ‘job’. The bad people I hunt down? They’re not actually people. They’re monsters, or demons, or, like with this case, ghosts… I’m a hunter. My whole family are hunters…” Dean suddenly started speaking very fast. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all this before, but I just wanted to try protecting you from it all just a little longer, and I’ll understand if you think I’m just some crazy nut job, and wouldn’t blame you if you decided to just take Matty and run, but I really don’t want to lose you, either of you, and I can’t bear the thought of losing you, and I’m _sorry_ I wasn’t there to protect you, and what I really want is for you to come live with me in the bunker, and I just, I love you so much, you and Matty are my whole world and I-”

Castiel pulled away from the kiss he’d pressed to Dean’s lips in order to stem the frantic flow of words. “I love you too.”

Dean looked stunned.  He hadn’t even realized he’d said it. But, even without thinking about it, he knew it was true.  He loved Castiel.  He loved him, and their son.  And he wanted them to always be close by, or at least somewhere he could be completely sure they’d be safe. “So… you _don’t_ think I’m crazy?”

“Well, I think it all sounds completely insane,” Cas began. “But I know what I saw. And what I saw was crazy.” He stole another kiss, which Dean wholeheartedly returned.  They sat with their foreheads together, content to be close.  Castiel sighed. “What’s the bunker?”

Dean let out a startled laugh.  He gave Cas the basic rundown of what, and where, the bunker was. “It’s completely safe. The place is warded up to the rafters and beyond.”

“…what about the house? Is it still dangerous?”

“No,” Dean assured. “No, we got her. It’s safe if you want to stay.”

“How?”

“Only way to get rid of a ghost is to either salt-and-burn the remains, or find the item their soul is anchored to and burn that.”

Castiel pulled back, a carefully blank expression on his face. “Salt and burn the remains…?”

“It purifies the remains. Lets the soul actually rest in peace,” Dean explained with no small amount of apprehension.

Castiel blinked slowly. “…what’s your brother’s name?”

Dean blinked, quicker. “What?”

“Your brother, what’s his name?”

“Um… Sam.”

Cas blinked again, eyebrows shooting up. “And, your sister’s name is Charlie?”

“…yes.” Dean replied slowly.  Castiel reached forward and unbuttoned the top of Dean’s shirt. “Cas, what…?”

He pulled the fabric to the side, revealing Dean’s chest tattoo.  He ran his fingertips across it, thoughts going a mile a minute. “…holy shit.”  A single thought rang through his head:

The Supernatural books were real…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (8) Not sure if anyone realized this, but the Theo I used is the one in 9.09 “Holy Terror” – the angel Cas steals grace from. Fun Fact: Sage Brockelbank (who played Theo) is 1.96m tall (approximately 6’5”). He’s the only other SPN character that I consciously switched species aside from Cas.
> 
>  **A/N:** Okay, so I made Theo much bigger ass than originally planned…


	12. Chapter 12

It had taken some explaining, but Castiel had been adamant about telling his brother and sister-in-law the truth.  He didn’t want to keep them out of the loop.  Besides, he wanted them to be able to come and visit them at the old Men of Letters bunker over Christmas.

Claire had been over the moon when he’d explained that all of it was real – and that his Dean was _the_ Dean.  It turned out, Castiel had been right: their interactions were interesting to watch.  To Jimmy and Amelia’s dismay, she started taking an active interest in hunting.  Dean was quick to assure them she wouldn’t be allowed to actually go on hunts.  At least not while she had zero field training.  She was content enough to focus on research – having access to the Men of Letters library had her head spinning and she was already planning out her dissertation. (This, at least, appeased her parents as it was a long-term goal that would take a few years to achieve.)

It was now getting close to New Years and Dean decided to take Castiel for a drive, just the two of them.  Matthew had taken an immediate shine to the inhabitants of the bunker – Sam was well on his way to becoming a favourite Uncle.  They hadn’t had some actual worry-free time alone, just the two of them, in over two years.

They’d stopped at a viewpoint, which was fairly secluded, and Castiel wasted no time manhandling Dean into the back seat.  They hadn’t been completely intimate since the night they’d conceived their son and he was determined to, _finally_ , change that.

Castiel braced himself against the door with his hands as Dean thrust into him, the sweat on his back making him slide on the leather bench seat.  One leg was up against Dean’s shoulder, the other wrapped around his waist.  He groaned as Dean nailed into his prostate, hot cock filling him up just as perfectly as he remembered.  He was vocal in his appreciation as he clung to Dean with one arm, the other still attempting to prevent his head from hitting the door.  When Dean’s forehead smacked into the window the two burst out in laughter.  The vibrations making Castiel gasp out a startled moan.  Dean pulled him up so he was straddling the hunter.  He took over, riding Dean’s thick shaft, curling forward with his face hidden in the crook of Dean’s neck in an attempt to prevent his head from hitting the roof.  They got a little too enthusiastic again and he failed.

“Okay, let’s try this again,” Dean chuckled when their laughter calmed down again.  He pulled out and manoeuvred Cas onto his back again, kissing him slowly and putting as much emotion into it as he could, hands sliding up and down his sides before hooking under his knees.  He let one go and lined his blunt tip up with Cas’ well lubed entrance, gently pressed in until he was sheathed to the hilt.  Cas breathed a gasp into Dean’s mouth, wrapping both legs around his hunter’s waist.  The moved together at a much less frantic pace.  Enjoying one another, being connected physically.

Dean wrapped his hand around Castiel’s leaking cock, gathering the precum on his fingers, and stroked him, running his thumb over the head, twisting his wrist a few times, until Cas dropped his head back, gasping as he came.  Dean rocked into him a little faster, groaning into Cas’ neck with his own release.

They lay in each other’s arms, languidly kissing until the winter chill outside began to creep over them as their bodies began to cool.

* * *

Four weeks later, Cas was scrambling to the bathroom to empty the contents of his stomach for the third day in a row.

-30-

**THE END**


End file.
